Wish you were here :)

Javier and I are about to send out our invitations!  (eek!)  The final ones should be stuffed tonight and the lot sent on Saturday.  I can't wait to share how they turned out (they are wonderful!), but I'll wait to give you a chance to see them in person first.  As we're excitedly sending out invitations, its hard not to think about some folks that we already know won't be able to be with us on our wedding day.

This is another 'wake up' to reality that I bet most brides go through at some point during their planning.  (Again, I would argue that the industry and the movies have not set us up for success here.  For heavens sake, King Triton (merman) finds a way to attend Ariel's out of water celebration.  Not to mention every comic relief character from Scuttle to the singing Chef.)  But life is not a movie (or a musical) and we knew going into our planning that some folks wouldn't be able to attend.  It just feels different when 'some folks' became actual names on your guest list...

Javier and I got an email from our dear friend Ando (shortly after we introduced him to you in our usher post) saying that he was not going to be able to make the epic journey from Down Under to the US of A in October.  He is busy at law school in Canberra and took a quick look at his class and assignment schedule for the fall and found no place to fit in a trip to the other side of the world.  Totally understandable.  We are, obviously, super disappointed (particularly since I was counting on pointing him towards any guest that wasn't having a good time at the wedding so that his adorable Aussie accent would wash over them and create an experience of pure joy...who's gonna do that now?) but know what a crossing of this magnitude would mean and don't want Ando compromising years of law school for one day.

Javier's godmother, Tia Ba, is also not going to be able to make it to VA in October.  She lives in Milwaukee where she owns a perfect children's book store (shown here).  She called Javier many months ago to let us know that, unfortunately, she'll be working a series of book festivals (where the store usually makes a significant portion of their yearly profits) including one on the weekend of our wedding.  Over the years I've had the chance to witness their playful but heartfelt bond and knew she would have been someone Javier wanted around on such a big day.   I know Javier was so sad to realize she wouldn't be there, but we know she'll always be there for us in our many years to come.  In the same way that you need more than just love in a marriage, you need more than love to get to a wedding, and money and distance and timing are all real obstacles when planning a trip that our wedding would require.

My Grandma.  Oh my Grandma. I have been so blessed to have both a Nana and Grandma close by for the entirety of my life.  They celebrated their 91st and 90th birthdays (respectfully) in the past 7 days and are, easily, two of the strongest women I know.  They have provided me with life lessons, warm memories and more love than I could ever express with words alone.  Both Grandma and Nana, within the last year, have moved out of their homes and into assisted living facilities, but it's my Grandma that has declined faster than was expected.  I held out hope for a long time that she would be well enough to attend the wedding, but we know now that it's just not an option.... My Grandma spent most of her time at home in the kitchen, at least when family was around, and I can't help but laugh at the number of old photos or home videos that find her right there, capturing her in her zone.  She was a baker like I've never known and it will be her Kolache recipe that we share with our guests at the wedding. I'm heartbroken that she won't be there physically, but I know I'll be thinking of her (particularly when I snag a Kolache mid-reception).

There are other friends and family members that have let us know they can't make it and we're sad, of course.  But I'm learning more and more (and I think I've said it on previous posts) that what we're focusing on right now is one day.  When really, Javier and I are in the middle of planning a lifetime, thats what our marriage means.  So yes, I wish desperately that some of these people could be there for what will certainly be a special day, but they'll be around after....its not an 'end' date, but a beginning.  We'll celebrate with Ando in December (if he can work a visit out then) and Tia Ba later in October when we're up in Milwaukee!  I hope everyone we invite can come to Charlottesville for the 13th, but if they can't - Javier and I look forward to a lifetime of celebrating our love with all our friends and family :)