'The public lands are a public stock, which ought to be disposed of to the best advantage for the nation.' – James Monroe

and dispose of them we shall (well kind of). I mean, its clearly to the best advantage of the nation that Javier and I get married right? maybe?-oh well, you get it I hope. That Javier and I will be wedding at good ole James Monroe's home of homes....



Ash Lawn-Highland!!!

Its not technically official, but we're planning to hand deliver the signed contract and deposit this Saturday when we head down to Cville. And just in case you didn't catch my hint in our Thanksgiving post - the date will October 13th, 2012 :) :) - so mark your calendars! (and seriously start praying there is no home football game that weekend)

http://www.ashlawnhighland.org/se--weddings.htm

Feel free to browse around, but I don't think the website gives a real good feel for the place. Its absolutely beautiful: lots of views of the mountains and 'yards' to host different parts of our day in. We're getting very excited and looking forward to walking around again on Saturday to really start some planning.

When it came down to it, I think we mostly decided that Venue #5 was just too far away. (Venue #5 was Delfosse vineyards by the way.) And Delfosse is absolutely gorgeous. If you are ever in Cville and have some time to kill it is definitely worth the trip out there. The winery is nestled in a small valley completely surrounded by mountains. But at the end of the day I knew that I would be really worried about the safety of our guests getting too and from (and in some cases around) the vineyard.

In a previous post I know I gave the *advice alert* to know your priorities. A big one for both of us is to really get to enjoy the day. I want to decide and plan now so that the day of is a stress less as possible. And I know myself well enough (as all of you do too, cause lets face it - only my closest of friends/family are reading this blog...) to know that I wouldn't be able to let go of the transportation stress that Delfosse was going to cause. I could see myself on the day of - walking around greeting guests and immeditately asking ' did you take the shuttle? Was if far? etc'

And as hard (and long) of a decision as it was to make, now that we have - I'm really excited! I'll help you start getting excited too by including some pictures from a wedding at Ash Lawn from this past September!

*sneak peak - the pictures were taken by one of the photographers we're considering :) Keep you updated as we meet with a few this weekend!

Its all about the FOOD!

Hello dedicated readers,

As you may have noticed there have been no blogs this week. This is because Javier and I have yet to make that ever-so-important venue decision. If we take this long to make all the other decisions that we'll inevitably have to make for this wedding - then our wedding date will be in 2027.

But its Thanksgiving tomorrow! Which may just be my absolute favorite holiday. The food. Its all about the food!

this turkey man looks almost as clueless as Javier and I

Oh, and I guess its about being thankful too :) I'm thankful that Javs and I will be spending Thanksgiving together this years :) and for our incredibly supportive (and patient) friends and family.

Hope everyone enjoys the day :) and some football on Saturday! (Go Hoos!)

PS - start praying for no home football game next October 13th!

Click, Click, Click

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtoBPZ-RSM4- listen to it. Its NKOTB. Its good.

Photography. Its our next conquest.

Whats that you say? We still don't have a date? or venue? - pish posh. (Well actually yes that is true, but we think after this weekend we'll have both!) So we're gazing longingly into the next realm of wedding planning for the joy and excitement that comes with the next steps in the process. And I want some really good pictures of the day :)

I know I keep saying it (and reminding others to say it), 'its just one day,' but in reality it is an important day. And certainly one where the pictures will last. College friend readers, remember when we'd have that epic night where it just seemed that we got some really good pictures. And those pictures would last forever and pop up everywhere. (I'm looking at the Jamie's bday night pic pre-wahooptie on my desk right now. And then that random night when we all wore black and white and took pics in front of the fireplace. I don't even remember what we did that night? but those pictures...they show up...on the frig, in frames on dressers...they're around)

Anyways, I'm sure the rest of you know too...you take a really good pic with your significant other and you want to print it and then make it your FB pic and then maybe your parents want a copy, etc, etc...and then its like this living thing that lasts waaaaaaay more than a day.

That's what these wedding pictures will be. They'll be the thing that can (and will) make this day last for us.

And you guys know me. After college I really started trying to take more pictures. (I think the line in Avenue Q's 'I wish I could go back to college' scared me into it.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ut6YtMXjaZY

So this brings me to the real reason for my post (which has nothing to do with advice or philosophy) but it is something I'm noticing more and more on the wedding blogs: the awkward wedding pics. They're hilarious and bound to happen (probably to me too), but I'm sure you guys have been noticing them too. Here are two I stumbled across just today.

Tell me that it does not look like this man is handcuffed and being escorted to the altar. Sure he has a big, goofy grin on and that lovely tux complete with little yellow boutonniere, but all I see is an arrest.

And maybe he only stood this way for a second. Heck, his buddy standing up there with him probably only had his hand on his shoulder for a brief 'hey man, this is it' kind of encouraging shake. But captured by that photographer - this moment reads: I'm being forced into this.

Its kind of hilarious.

And this one. There is no way those two girls on the left are looking at anything other than the monstrosity hanging around that bride's neck. That 'look natural, like you're hanging out and smiling at the beautiful bride' turned a little too natural. (cause we all know we'd probably stare at it too.)

Anyways, regardless of the photographer we select I'm sure Javier and I (and our closest friends) are sure to guarantee some awkwardness caught on camera - something to look forward to after the big day.

If you find any good (and by that I mean quality or ridiculous) photos or photographers - feel free to send them my way!

PS - there was apparently a trend to take a pic with the groom peering from under the bride's dress...what do we think? on our 'must click' list?

The Bermuda Triangle

Everyone who has planned a wedding has said that it is super fun. But what they forget to tell you is that at the beginning things are a bit frustrating. You feel slightly lost: there's a lot to be done, and so many directions to start in, so focusing your energy on one can be quite difficult. I'm calling it the Bermuda Triangle effect, and it really hinges on 3 factors: budget, venue, and date. Of course there are more factors than these three that affect everything else that goes into wedding planning, but those are really the big three. When you have your budget set, you know what size of wedding you could have. When you know the size, you know what venues will be large enough. And when you know what venue you want, then you can set your date. Or you can start with a date - perhaps it's one VERY important to you - then you can only work with venues that have that availability. And then you can pick guests - and set your budget - based on the venue size.

**ADVICE ALERT** Commit to one of those three factors and let it govern the rest of your decisions, having a good understanding of the other two.

Audrey and I aren't quite in the clear of the Bermuda Triangle yet. As you all know, we are close to deciding on a venue (come on, you didn't really think I would tell you now, did you??). We don't have a date exactly finalized, but we are pretty sure of when it will be (again, you really think I'd tell you here?!?). So for us, budget was the anchor of our triangle. Sure, there were some venues that were more expensive, and we may have been willing to go with them, but it would have meant cutting back on other parts of the wedding, likely guest list.

Some really great advice that Audrey and I got from a friend is to focus on vendors that can only do one wedding per day. So venue is a big one (unless you're a Vegas chapel), and so is photographer. After we finalize the when and where, we'll focus on the who (as in, who will take photos of us all day?). Stay tuned for more information on that later!

Eenie, meenie, miney, mo

Javs and I have stalled (just momentarily) in our wedding planning which is why there have been no posts regarding the announcement of our venue and date. Apparently, it is these two minor details on which the rest of your planning has to hinge - who knew?

For a variety of reasons, we are still in the debating portion of nailing down that date and locale, but I'm learning something through the process!!

**Advice Alert** - Pick the right guy to plan your wedding with.


There have already been more tears and long sighs and 'looks' from me during this planning period than I was hoping for in the entire year. (I was setting my ambitions high.) And the truth is, its stressful. I know everyone says that, but then you get here and my goodness - all those brides were right. (I think I thought if I told myself enough that I wasn't gonna stress about it, that I just wouldn't. You know, a little mind over matter.) But not the case.

Now that being said, I'm lucky enough to have found another being of the homo sapien variety that knows me so well and knows how to handle those rolled or wet eyes when they arrive. As stressed as I've felt, I'm also still having a ton of fun....because I'm doing it with him. And he's fun. And he makes it fun for me.

One of my wedding blogs said this is one of the first major projects you'll work on together which is why it can be particularly stressful. (Javs and I completed a corn hole set with minimal emotional scarring, but I guess that's not quite equivalent to the current project we've undertaken. I think corn hole cost us a whopping $100 -totally worth it by the way.) But in some ways, maybe the planning is a good test. It's going to be stressful - so you'll learn a little bit about how that affects you both and how you handle it together.

Javier has been amazing - reminding me that its 'just one day,' understanding when I do find things that are important to me, giving me space and time to grieve (or vent) over options that just aren't going to work out and being there with new ideas or solutions. I said earlier that I was so happy at how excited he was about starting to plan the day. I know some girls wouldn't mind either way if their boy was into it or not, but its been super perfect for me! And I guess thats my message - if you have the right match for you - it'll work out.

And if you can find someone you can plan with - the marriage part just might be worth it.

Hola! Me llamo Audrey Cabezas...

...or at least that's what I can say when Javier and I arrive in CHILE for our honeymoon :)


I figured since Javs' post left so many questions, I should provide our readers with some concrete, down and dirty details (to keep their interest).

I think I'm also supposed to be providing some sort of advice or philosophical thoughts on the blog, right? I mean that's why I'm eating up Style Me Pretty and WeddingBee......and Ruffled and Wedding Chicks...and JuneWeddingBug.... but anyways, I'll start sharing some of the great wisdom I'm sure I'm gaining from this experience :)

I guess our honeymoon came about because of our priorities.

**Advice Alert** - Make sure you and your better half know what your priorities are for the big day and after :)

One of our biggest priorities is family & friends! Javs said it in his post, we're willing to pass on dream wedding venues cause they're too small. Lord knows we have some of the best family and friends around so having everyone show up to celebrate is important :)

Our honeymoon locale did not make the priority list. I mean of course we want to go some place fun, beautiful, relaxing, exciting, etc etc, but there were many places that Javier and I named to fit that bill.

So when Mrs. Cabezas suggested a post-nuptial pilgrimage to the homeland for some Chilean family celebrating - we jumped at the idea! We had already been struggling with how to include this portion of the family in our day without it costing an arm and a leg for anyone. Now, we're going to 1) get to see so many of the Cabezas clan and 2) get to go to an amazingly awesome place for our honeymoon!! We're hoping Javier's cousin will help with some of the planning for a small reception for the family when we arrive! So we'll spend a few days in Vina Del Mar - soaking up some Cabezas love - and then head to some of the volcanoes and lakes for which Chile is known to do some newlywed relaxing.

Priority + family = Chile honeymoon :)

so no venue, no date - but boy are we starting to plan that vacation. What does that say about our priorities....

Hasta la vista!

You'll Want to Elope

When I first told my office that Audrey and I got engaged, my office of course congratulated me and asked for the story and all of that, but my boss in particular had one thing to tell me. She said that throughout our planning process we would just scrap everything and just look at each other and say "let's just elope."

As you all know, Audrey and I started our journey for finding where we will get married this last weekend. We didn't want to be the only ones to see the potential space, though, so we invited along some "hunting companions" - her parents and sister, and my mother. The day started off with 5 venues to go look at, with the hopes of finding that perfect one that we loved.

We made the trek down to C'ville early in the AM, and everything started off very well. We got to Venue #1 and determined that it was gorgeous, but perhaps a little too small of a reception space. It likely didn't help that the events coordinator for the venue wasn't there, so we had to (try to) get answers from the security guard. The venue was certainly in the hunt, but it wasn't a clear winner.

We then made our way to Venue #2 and were actually there a bit early. Ahead of schedule! Who would have thought that with most of the rest of

our lives operating on Latino time?? The venue was nice, but I could tell from the get-go that it wasn't likely going to be the one that we went with. You know how there are just some things in life that you know you won't love, like pickled eggs, the Yankees, or the USSR? This was one of those things for me. Our entire hunting party left for Venue #3 knowing that this place could be A solution, but likely not THE solution.

The five of us then headed over to Venue #3, the pricey venue. Venue #3 knew they were pricey, too. They brought all of us into a side room and started to ask us about what we envisioned as our perfect idea of a wedding. Then they said they'd show us how they could do it and at the end talk about pricing to be up-front. That screams $$$. Show us everything so that we fall in love with it and say "it doesn't matter how much it costs, we want it!"?? Nice try, plan. (Though they totally had me on the hook). We left Venue #3 knowing that it would have made for a GORGEOUS event, but that sometimes things aren't quite worth the price of admission.

The day was half-over at this point, and we had 3 venues down, 2 more to go, and not much more of a clear picture. With our stomachs empty, we all stopped for lunch. It's at about this point that we had our first "let's just elope" feeling. There was little progress, and it seemed like perhaps the day was going to leave us more confused rather than providing clarity. We tabled the feeling and set off for the afternoon.

We went to Venue #4 and within about 5 minutes were able to leave. That "let's elope" feeling started to come back to me as we then headed to our fifth and final venue. We got to Venue #5 after many hours in Charlottesville, and those long hours were not setting us up for success. But then we got to see the view and the reception space and - even without it set up at all - we were able to see just how great this space could be! It really was a "save the best for last" type of feeling! We aren't 100% that Venue #5 will be the one we go with, but after a few days of weighing the options, it does seem to be separating from the pack.

I'm sure that there will be many feelings of wanting to elope in the coming year, but just like this, I know that Audrey and I will always find the silver lining and rise above the temporary stress. Stay tuned for which of our mystery venues ends up being the one that we sign with!

A hunting we will go...

...for a wedding venue that is! And I certainly do mean hunting.

Who would have thought that other brides & grooms might have considered Cville in the fall a more than picture perfect location for their nuptial bliss?

Javier and I had talked about getting married/the wedding prior to last week (I know...gasp) so we had already talked about cville being our first target for the big day. After some disappointing calls to some of the top (and by top I mean most well known) wedding venues, we're heading to cville this weekend with a new outlook and new plan. Veritas, King's Family, Pippin Hill (new vineyard), Castle Hill, Panorama and Barboursville (look em up if you don't know them, but don't bother sharing all the oohs and ahhs with me...I know they're gorgeous...that's why they were my first choices) are all booked for every Saturday in September and October of 2012. All. Booked.


:0

I know.


(hence the hunting)

Have no fear, my spectacular spectators. We took a day to mourn (and by we I mean me and by a day I mean about a day and a half) and have regrouped with a new plan. Unbelievably, there are other wedding venues in cville and they are not completely booked for next fall! So we embark on our crusade with open hearts and pens in hand (for signing that contract) this Sunday.

I'll keep you posted, but until then, may the scent of your prey be pungent and the feet of your hounds swift :)

Javier popped THE question

As many of you know, (I write as if I have readers already) Javier popped THE question just one week ago today. I thought there was no better way to start my blogging career, than with a recount of one of the happiest days of my life.

Well first off, I was just a mess at work. (okay, I can admit it...I was highly suspicious that the night was going to be the night) We had a date night planned, which truly isn't that out of the ordinary. We try to go on date nights during the week whenever we can (just out to dinner or a show), but this date night had been planned (by Javs) just far enough in advance to make me wonder.

We started with a walk along the Tidal Basin (a route we like to meander often). He was acting so normal - discussing his day, mine, etc that I thought for sure I must have been wrong. Tonight wasn't going to be the night at all because he wasn't nervous at all. (I had heard from so many guys that they were just terrified when the moment finally came which inevitably caused an awkwardness that is palpable.) So there he was, jabbering away per usual.

Then he suggested we stop by to see Al on our way to dinner....

The Albert Einstein memorial was a stop on one of our first dates. (He took me on a White House tour right before Christmas so it was all decorated. Then Old Ebbitt Grill for brunch. Then to see Al - his favorite DC memorial.)

Once we arrived at the Einstein memorial....I knew this was it. It was like a little switch, inherited through natural selection that tells boys to panic in moments of intense vulnerability, was flipped. He was adorably and obviously nervous. There were other people at the memorial, which happens sometimes when we visit. We usually wait for others to leave so we can hang out with Al alone (its not that large of a memorial), but Javier seemed particularly impatient and unsure of what to do with our unwanted company. They finally left and we walked around a bit. I plopped on Al's lap and this was when Javier started. He reminded me that this had been the spot of one of our first dates and told me how much he had come to love me since. Then he got down on one knee, pulled out a ring and said 'I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?'

I'm giving him a hard time, but I think I was equally nervous and said something like 'of course I'll marry you!' (not like I haven't been thinking about this moment for months to prepare my answer ;)

Lots of kisses and hugs and 'Oh my god, we're getting married!!'s ensued.

He had made reservations at 4 different restaurants to continue our celebration. (what a little planner :) We ended up at Tallula with Kelsey & Scott (the spot Javier first met them as 'my boyfriend') We got to call my parents and drove to MD to share our news with Javs' mom, sister and brother. It was such a wonderful night. I loved how excited he was (and has been since that moment)

It was a great start to a new chapter in our lives together...